Monday, September 15, 2008

One Month

I would like to steal Dooce's idea and write letters to Aidric. It seems natural to write as if I am talking to him. I want both of us to have these musings later on. So that I can remember these times, which are blurring by at amazing speed. And so Aidric can have this if he is ever curious.


You are a month old. The only thing negative I have to say is that my time with you is going way too fast. You change every day. You continue to do things which astound me. And a month later, my eyes burn wet with tears when I think of your birth. I have a big lump in my throat right now trying to hold in the love. Your Daddy and I are still adjusting to our new improved life with you. I am trying to learn how to fit my own needs into the day. Days which you consume hungrily, like you consume my heart.

The week after you were born, I noticed your eyelashes and eyebrows growing so fast. Your eyelashes are so coppery, and your eyebrows look brownish. Your hair is like nothing I have ever seen - blond roots and brown ends. We love your little foot reflex of wrapping your toes around our finger. You already would "walk" and press your feet into the ground when we hold you up. Yesterday, you pushed yourself over from your tummy to your back. Freaked us out. And just like your parents, you absolutely love to pig out. I think you look just like your Daddy, but I can see a little of me too. You are tall. Everyone remarks so. You can thank your Grandpas for that.

In just one month you have started making these sweet little sounds. "Ah-yoo", "Nghee", and "Hoo". You can track my face or your rattle toy back and forth, up and down. You grab for things, especially my hair. You seem to be focusing on more things, and you can find me with your eyes from across the room. Just the other day, you were in your bassinet, making little sounds and hanging out. I came into the room to check on you, hoping you were drifting off, and when you saw me you did a double take and started to cry for attention. You've already figured out you can manipulate Mommy. Little Stinker.

Oh, and heartaches of all heartaches, you are starting to make tears. I cannot handle that.

This first month has been all about keeping you safe in our home, away from the real world. You are our little treasure that we are keeping all to ourselves. I know it hasn't been too exciting. Just eating, sleeping, diaper changes, and a little playtime on the couch. I melt when I see your Daddy holding you and smiling at you.

We love you so much that it has shocked us. We feel so honored to have you with us and so proud of you already as a person.

Every morning you wake up at dawn. Your eyes are bright and wide awake, calmly looking around in wonder. The traffic noise hasn't started yet. The sky is turning silvery, and we can feel the cool morning air drifting in. This is the sweetest time of the day with you, our special loving time when you smile and coo, and I kiss you a million times. We look at each other, studying the faces we see. I wonder what you are thinking and feeling. As for me, I am thinking that I hope I never take you for granted. I am thinking what a miracle you are. I am feeling completely captive to the love I have for you. My Little Man.


ks1k said...

Joy, Mark and Aidric,

What a great treasure you are creating for your Little Man.


Kristin C. said...

heartache of all heartaches, you are starting to make tears....

crushed my heart into a thousand pieces! How sweet and tender!

You all seem to be coming along so well as a family, congratulations!