Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Aidric's Birth Story, Part II

You are two weeks old today, Baby. Little Leo. Little Lionheart. These two weeks have been the fastest in my whole life. I'm a little sad that my time with you already seems to go by too fast. But just a little sad, and it's not enough to affect the bliss of having you here on the outside where I can kiss you and cuddle you. And take your picture.

I am amazed at the changes I can see already. Your eyelashes get longer every day, and your eyebrows are filling in. I think they look like my eyebrows, but hopefully they will turn out to be Daddy's. Your cheeks are getting chubbier and more easily nibbled. You like to power nurse most of the day, and are tending to sleep for longer chunks at night, which makes me so very happy. FYI, Mom is much happier and a better Mom when she gets more than 3 half hour sleep sessions overnight. We have also noticed that as you fall asleep, you get this frightened look on your face and whimper. Like you are not sure what's happening with this whole falling asleep thing. And in those seconds, my heart breaks when I see that frightened look. The entire spectrum of emotions run through me as I observe all your expressions. Your little half smile fills my heart till it bursts, and when you look directly into my eyes, I become a weepy mess.

So onto your birth story:

We were all crowded into the triage area, which was basically this narrow long room with curtains separating all us laboring women. The space was about 8 by 8 feet, and the folks on either side would press into the curtain or push a chair into our space. So Ana Paula, the doula, Rebecca, the midwife, Mark, you, and I were all in this little space. The very sweet nurse, Stacy C., tried a few times to get an IV port into me, blowing out one of my veins. So I got some IV fluids, a pulse thingie on my finger, a fetal heartbeat monitor on my belly, and a innie contraction monitor(it fits in between my uterus and baby's head), which Dr. Wu recommended. Had I known how excruciating it would be to get that thing in, I never would have agreed to it.

So now I have tubes coming out of my arm, my crotch, and a thingie on my finger. And I realize that a contraction while lying down in bed is about ten thousand times more painful than one at home where I could move around and hold onto Mark. And the contractions were getting so strong. I started my rebellious reputation with the nurses by refusing to just lie there. And by eating grapes. Ana and Rebecca were so awesome because they would explain everything to us. What this procedure meant, or do we really need to do this, etc. Because the nurses, as awesome as they were, were so ridiculously overworked and didn't have the time to answer all my questions.

We were there in triage for a little over three hours, so I had time to think about what happened. We had planned and done so much to ensure a beautiful, peaceful, home birth. I had made special music CDs for labor and after. We had all the towels, blankets, and medical stuff all set up. I had visualized, meditated, and dreamed about how your entrance into the world was going to be in your home, calm, surrounded only by loving wise women, your Daddy and me. I knew that the plan was really more for us than for you, Little Man. But it was for you. I didn't want you to be touched first by strangers, in a room full of machines, and getting the toxic effects of my anesthesia and cow derived pitocin.

But I knew we had to make the best of it, and we were going to have fun. You were going to be born soon. How could we not be thrilled? I softened and surrendered to the situation, the situation you seemed to need. I was relaxed and excited too. We finally got a room around 11:30. I was checked (6 cm!). And then a very funny man stuck a needle and tube into my spinal cord. Mark was very uneasy and a little terrified while that was happening. But he stayed strong for me. We decided to give me an epidural to relax my super-cervix so it would finally dilate. Dr. Wu said that it felt like a tight band was there on the cervix and wouldn't stretch any further. So then my legs became numb and paralyzed, and I fell asleep. Woke up around 1:30 am and Ana, Rebecca, and Mark were eating In-N-Out burgers, and I scored some fries. New nurse (also named Stacy) caught me eating and scolded me. I was still 6 cm, so they gave me more pitocin. We all talked and I told them my recipe for whoopie pies, and promised to make them some soon. I fell asleep again, and woke up around 3:40. Ana and Rebecca looked over at me, and they knew immediately. We didn't even need the nurse to check. We could see your little fuzzy head peaking out!

to be continued...


AllBeehive said...

I love your story, but I'm going to need some more pictures of Aidric please. I'm going through withdrawal over here.

ks1k said...

Great writing job and big memories for the little ninja.

It is tough to read through the tears though.

Soooo happy for you.


Peggy said...

Joy, what was the purpose of the needle and tube in your spinal cord?

Dave said...

I agree, More pics! and is it ok to admit that i cried just reading this? nice work. you guys are such good parents! he's a lucky little leo, baby boy, little man.

Lynn said...

My mother was 36 when she gave birth to me, and she was told that her uterus was too weak to make the cervix dilate enough. Someone might have an idea how to reduce this problem in the future.

saffry said...

I'm sorry you didn't get the home birth you wanted, but happy to know that you're smart and flexible enough to do what was best for you and Aidric.

I'm glad he's letting you sleep again. He's been out long enough to get on a schedule, hopefully it's one you like too. It will be nice to have the cooler weather of fall to get out and go for walks, just don't overdue until your ligaments get back to normal. Love to you all.